Why Does Grief Feel Heavier in the Fall?

As the days grow shorter and the air turns crisp, many people notice an ache rising inside them. Autumn is beautiful — the leaves turn brilliant, the light softens — and yet, it can also stir up grief in ways that feel unexpected and heavy. One of the most widely discussed topics in my therapy room in September, October and November is the feeling of grief and loss. This time period is often referred to as “the season of loss.” If you’ve found yourself carrying more sadness in the fall, you’re not alone.

The Season of Reflection

Fall has a way of slowing us down. The long, busy days of summer give way to quieter evenings and earlier darkness. With less distraction, our minds and hearts often turn inward. That shifting inward can feel difficult but I encourage people to lean in to that. There are often unmet needs or unprocessed emotions that require our attention in this sacred and quiet space. That stillness can open the door to memories we’ve tucked away — of people we’ve lost, seasons of life that have ended, or changes we didn’t choose.

You’re Not Alone

If you’ve noticed your grief growing sharper this time of year, it isn’t because you are regressing in grief work. Grief work is never linear. It's because it's a phenomenon that reveals itself each year. It’s part of being human, part of living in rhythm with the seasons. Sometimes the heart remembers on its own timetable, and fall simply gives it more room to speak.

Triggers All Around

This season is rich with rituals and traditions. Holidays approach. Family gatherings loom. Even small seasonal markers — like the smell of a bonfire, the first cold morning, or the sound of leaves underfoot can stir old memories. For those who grieve, those moments are layered and often bittersweet: part beauty, part ache.

The Body Keeps Time

There’s also a biological rhythm at play. As daylight lessens, our energy naturally dips. Seasonal Affective Disorder is prevalent for most and even without a diagnosis, many people feel the darker days in their bodies. When energy is low, grief feels heavier to carry. For many people they may be approaching a birthday of a lost loved or an anniversary of the loss. Often in this season I hear people say “I just feel sad and heavy and I don't know why.” After some digging the client and I will realize that one of those dates is coming up – the person was not totally aware of the timing but their body was. Our body keeps the score and our body knows – sometimes far more than what our conscious mind does.

A Way Forward

There’s no way to erase the heaviness, but there are ways to soften the edges and move forward with it:

• Name it and validate it.  Simply acknowledging “my grief feels heavier right now” can bring relief.

• Make space. Give yourself permission to feel, whether through journaling, a quiet walk, or talking with someone you trust.

• Seek light. Literally — by spending time outdoors or near a window — and figuratively, by noticing small joys that coexist with sorrow.

• Lean on community. Sharing stories, meals, or silence with others can ease the loneliness of grief.

• Find a way to honor the person you've lost. Write them a letter, engage in an activity that they once enjoyed, make their favorite meal. Don't hide from the feelings, bring the person or thing you are grieving into the light and honor it.

Final thoughts:

Grief in the fall may never vanish completely, but it can be met with gentleness. Just as the trees let go of their leaves, we too are reminded of a season of letting go and invited to acknowledge what has been lost — and to trust that even in the darker seasons, light still finds its way through.